19 Jun A Fair Shake At The End….
Kevin, a fit mid 50’s magazine editor approached me after one of my services with a half-hearted smile saying he’d totally change his “no funeral service” motto if I’d agree to write and deliver his life story. His body language transitioned to indicate he was leaving yet he never left the bubble zone. You know the one where a conversation can rekindle with ease. And it did. Except without the ease. Kevin was not at ease and it wasn’t the death of the 92 year old that had him off centre. He resumed the topic of his own funeral using his best hypothetical tone explaining that should his insane back pain turn out to be something other than a pulled muscle, he might have to actually address his mortality. Kevin’s eyes told me that he was pretty darn sure his back pain wasn’t a benign middle-aged issue. His awkward banter, I suspect, was unnerving him as well. Before he switched gears to what he really wanted to discuss, he was collected and charismatic. Kevin, in his best someday voice, was asking me to help him plan his own Celebration of Life with the knowing that “someday” was likely this day.
Six days later, I received an email from Kevin. Two days after our meeting, he ended up in the ER and now is waiting for the Oncologists to provide him with a treatment game plan. The only thing that was different, at least from my perspective, was that Kevin was formally told what he already knew.
While we have talked about his Celebration of Life, Kevin is also looking to me for his roadmap. This is a man who wants, “a fair shake at the end.” An honest exit from this world. I get it! Oh, boy, I so get it!!!
Funeral-phobes, listen up!! It doesn’t have to be how it always has been. There are pre-planners in the industry and I am certainly not one of them but Kevin has brought an issue to my attention. I believe he represents a distinct cross-section of people that also require an independent, honest advocate.
I’m stepping up to that plate……..
Telling Stories…..One Legacy At A Time
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